Lutton: the February 2023 walk

Lutton is a village which has a population of 186 according to the latest census.

The name of the village means the settlement connected with The Loud One.

Now The Loud One is in fact a direct translation of “Hluding” which is an old name for Billing Brook.

The village of course has a church part of which is captured in this picture, and part of the parts (if you get my drift) were built in the 12th century, which is officially A Long Time Ago, or mediæval times as it is popularly known.  It is a grade I listed building, meaning that it can’t be modernised, and thus remains something of a dead spot for wifi.

Now it is quite amazing what you can find out about a place – indeed even a small place – when you go looking, and thus it was that I discovered that Lutton contains 16 houses that are owned outright, 14 owned with a mortgage, 13 that are rented, and two that are lived in rent free.

This notion of living in properties “rent free” seemed rather interesting to me, and in considering it in detail I rather feared that this might be the start of…

some sort of anarcho-syndicalist revolutionary movement in the village which could spread from here outwards, destroying the entire social fabric of capitalism as we know it.

I mean to say, just looking at the grass upon which the merry band walked and one can most certainly perceive extremist left wing views therein.

You will also notice that some of our members are wearing coats and sunglasses, which is another indicator that “something is up”.

Barns are also popular

in this part of the world as can be seen and it is interesting that according to the census no one is living in any of the barns.  As the picture herein reveals our members were most interested in seeing for themselves that this was true, and indeed it was confirmed that human habitation was there none.  The census was correct in this regard.

However the rural nature of our visitation was such that there were no restaurants or supermarkets en route – a serious loss of an opportunity by the local council I feel, and so the partaking of one’s own comestibles was required.

The rule in the village and its environs is that hats must be worn even when eating and drinking, and thus it was.

But interestingly there is no similar rule for the wearing of hats when walking and so it was perfectly legal for these to be disposed of once “traversing the fields”, as the activity is known.

Of course, much attention was paid to seeing if anyone could spot any of the 186 population noted in the census, but they all seemed to be hiding.

And that raises a question – if when the census was taken they all (save 186 slow coaches) went into hiding, the census could be wrong.  Thus instead of the population of England being 59,980,000 as Google says, it might be 59,980,039, with the population of Lutton having been in the undergrowth at the moment the census was taken.

The group thus did stop for another session of “spot the native” but after much looking around, it was concluded that no, there were going to be none emerging on this day.

It was felt that some could have been hiding in the pond, but even investigation therein revealed none.

And thus our merry band marched, or in the case of those who had added gin to their hot drink, meandered, forthwith.

Then, in good time made it back from whence all had come, another jolly ramble undertaken and complete.  Indeed the number counted in at the end was the same as the number counted out at the start, which is always a good sign.

Photos from Simon, highly inaccurate and largely irrelevant notes, as ever, by Tony.  Spelling mistakes by WordPress.